Tuesday, December 13, 2011

I'll Just Stick to the Bunny Slopes Thanks.

So last weekend my friend Joe came into town and invited me to go skiing with his family. I was so excited however there was this minor flaw to this great plan. I have never skied before. So already you should know that it was a good weekend.
So he knew and his mom was all prepared to teach me.
So the first lesson that she tried to give me was to get get back up after falling down.
She was like, "It's going to happen so it is important to learn."
So she "fell over" and taught me what to do. So it took her like 15, 20 seconds.
So then she stood up and told me it was my turn and that because I needed to know she was not going to help me at all. So then she made me sit down like I had "fallen over" and make me try to get up.
So after almost five minutes she finally helped me up and said, "We'll work on that later, lets try stopping."
What a huge fail! I was so embarrassed but it really was so funny! But who know it was kinda, just a little bit hard.
So then she taught me how to do the pizza slices to slow down and stop. So then it was my turn to try. And I don't think that at the time my pizza slices were as good as they grew to become because I couldn't stop and I went past the little flag marker and into this huge ditch thing that had so much snow in it that me and my skis got stuck. So then Suzy came into try and save me but then got sucked in herself. So then we are laughing because we are stuck in snow that literally came up to my hips. So then she also took this time to teach me how to pop off my skis so I could some what crawl my way out of this pit of snow.
So finally after another five minutes I started stopping again.
I felt kinda bad because a little while later when Joe's dad came over she was like, "Honey. Why don't you try and she if you can explain it differently to her."
Pretty much translates into, "Oh my gosh home girl in totally incompitant and keeps falling over and I want a break for a few minutes because home girl is killin me."
It was like, horrible but funny. I honestly felt like I should have video taped forever one so you would know that it was really as bad at it sounds. I just kept falling over. And over and over and over. Luckily I didn't walk away with any bruises that were too crazy, but there were a few. And benefit. I did finally master the art of being able to get up. 
Ugh. It was horrible.
But, after a while (a semi-long while) I started doing pretty well. Well enough for me to try the lift. So they warned me that it was gonna be a little weird at first and that it might fall over. Well they forgot to tell me to lean forward to so yeah. I defiantly fell over. But, after the second time, I was a pro and totally mastered the art of the lift. So that was a big accomplishment.
So like I said, after a while I actually got pretty good. Well goodish. I still wasn't Lindsey Vaughn status goin all crazy and what not but it was good.
So at one point Joe was like, lets try a run. It'll be super easy. It's just like a bunny slope except a little longer. 
So after he convinces me to go,  I wanted to die. So the first slope we come to was super steep! I was like Joe! Are you serious right now. So we start going and, of course, I start going towards that side of the mountain off into the flagged area towards the trees. So I couldn't stop and I just kept going so I just decided to do what I do best and fall over.
So after we make it down this tiny little steep hill of death, it did get a little easier. Until Joe and I found out that the easy run that we had planned on taking was closed! So then it combined with another run that was ridiculous. The whole last hill was completely steep and I just wanted to slide on my back all the what way down. I'm sure that would have been a lot fast.So anyways, after 46 minutes of this one run, and about 45 falls later, we finally made it to flat ground. It was really a lot of fun but I felt so lame. Haha. 
And it was super irritatingly, funny that I would see these little seven, eight years old passing me, looking at me, and judging me through their little doll size ski masks because I kept falling with every inch of progress I made.
Like, if I wasn't trying t ski and was just watching safely from the lodge with some hot chocolate then I would have been totally so impressed by them and their ability to do flips and trick and single handed trout grabs when they were only as tall as my  hip. But because we were on the same snowy field, it brought it to a whole new level of competition. A level that wanted me to push them, or throw and small snowball, or maybe my skiing pole at them as they flew by me. Judging me. But I love kids! Yay for them.
So anyways. It was super good. I loved it. Hopefully when or if the next time I go it won't be so bad. But even for falling over a lot it was so much fun. 
But I think was made me feel a little better was knowing that that my skiing outfit was cute. That whole thinking of if you look good, you feel good really is true. 
However it was always much better after I dusted all the snow off my back that way it didn't it didn't totally show like I had just fallen all they way down the slope. Yes. Much better.

2 comments:

  1. Sounds exactly like my first time skiing.

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  2. this seems oddly familiar. i hate trying to ski or board on snow... it is a completely lost art on me.

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